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Dear CRF,

I’ve been dating my my boyfriend for a few months now. We’ve known each other for a year and four months now. We both have children from other people. He has 2 daughters and 1 son and I have 3 sons. His daughters are curious and want to know if they could call me mom. I am leery of this because their Dad and our relationship is still fresh. Both kids adore us and love hanging out with us. My question is what should be the best advice to tell a 12 yr old and a 6 year old girl?


I understand why you’d be weary of allowing his kids to call you mom since you have only been dating him for a few months. I’m sure if you were their mother, or if your kid’s father just started dating someone, you wouldn’t want your kids calling a brand new girlfriend mom.

Before you have the talk with his children, I suggest you have a talk with him and let him know what his daughters asked you. Let him know that you believe it is too soon and that you’d like for him to address them with you. To appease the little ones, maybe you all can come up with a nickname that they can call you as a special friend in their lives.

Blending families can be amazing but it can also be difficult. Take your time, get to know him, build on the foundation of the relationship, etc. before you get the kids too deeply involved.

Good luck.

~Dena Reid, Esq., Founder of Code Red Flag. Follow us on Instagram & Twitter. LIKE us on Facebook.
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