Have you ever been with someone but you were confused as to whether they truly loved you or not? They may say it, they may even show it at times, but their words and actions are not consistent with a person who has chosen to love you. Well no need to be confused any longer. He/She does NOT love you. In fact, I will go out on a limb and say that he/she doesn’t have any idea what love is, much less what it entails.

You see, people use the word love for all types of reasons; including but not limited to, lust, infatuation, and even manipulation. It is often said that women look for love and end up with sex while men look for sex and end up with love. As such, folks have been using the term love for their own selfish reasons probably since the beginning of time.

This is not to say that when you love someone there won’t be arguments or hard times. In fact, you may experience the feeling of love flee at times in the relationship. But love, true love, is more than just a feeling. It’s a commitment to care for another even when the situation makes it difficult. Real love is shown in action, not just felt or heard.

The next time someone tells you they love you ask them what their definition of love is. You may find that what they define isn’t love at all. And if that’s the case, proceed with caution if you dare proceed at all.

How do you define love?
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Written by Dena Reid, Esq., Founder of Code Red Flag and Author of the Best Seller, Flag on The Play: A Woman’s Guide to Finding Mr. Right in a World Full of Mr. Right Nows.