On Valentine’s Day 3 years ago, our first as a married couple was a really unexpected spontaneous night out. Our Original plans were to go out with some friends for group Valentine’s outing. But all our friends bailed on us. We were not going to let the babysitter (grandparents) go to waste so we made our own fun.

We took a leap of faith and went to an unknown place just because we saw a deal coupon online. I love being spontaneous but my Ex-Marine hubby usually needs a plan and a recommendation (“to make sure we don’t waste our time.”). I have mentioned in the past, how I love trying new things. He seemed to have been listening. Dinner was great; they had a Surf and Turf Special – I ADORE LOBSTER and Hubs LOVES Steak – Perfect fit!!! The hotel was a cute boutique style place you can find all over Miami and never go into. It was by the Ocean and we went for a windy stroll out by the pool after dinner. We were in the moment. *HAPPINESS* We then found a bar close by and sat for a couple hours to have drinks and listen to music. When we walked back to the car we talked about how it felt like we were on a DATE, which we hadn’t had in a long time. It was the most fun we have had in a while with just the 2 of us. We talked so much, just like on our first date. We reminisced about our first few dates, we revealed some secrets from back then and we laughed, kissed and HAD A BLAST!!

​And what I realized when we were ending the night was that this “Date” and “Fun” did not have to be reserved only for Valentine’s Day, an Anniversary or a Birthday. I know people talk a lot nowadays about dating you spouse or significant other. I want give you some tips to make those dates a little extra special. If you take the opportunity to be Spontaneous in your relationship and “Date” your significant other often this will bring a renewed spirit and intimacy to your relationships.

Step 1: Be Spontaneous- Go into the unknown
I recommend you go on a spontaneous date with your significant other even if it’s not Valentine’s Day. We try to have a Spontaneous Date 1 a month. More often is probably better. Try an unknown non-recommended restaurant, Go to the batting cages just out of the blue (even if you hate sports, his fun can be your fun even if you stink), try out miniature Golf and act like teenagers. Whatever it is don’t plan it just go, do and have fun.

Step 2: Learn to appreciate surprises
I have learned that letting go of control can yield some great results. Doesn’t Micro manage the Date!! Accept whatever he suggests because he plans it from the Heart whether it is perfect or not.

Step 3: Be ready for unexpected Gifts: Appreciate what you get and Say what you like
Besides doing something unexpected on a date you may receive or give unexpected gifts. Bonus!! Don’t over analyze it just Enjoy and say Thank you.

​So date each other like you just met and make it spontaneous. Get out your comfort zone; you could be very surprised by the results. ALSO be grateful for everything He/She does because whether it was what you thought you wanted or not, I can assure you the person gave it to you from their heart.

Please share your comments and love!!
With Love,
Ari, Relationship and Communication Specialist as well as a Certified Master Coach.
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