Dear CRF, Should I Make Him Wait?

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Dear CRF

“When first meeting someone who you’re interested in dating…after the first date, why is it suggested to wait a week or so before seeing them again?

My friend told me to “make him wait a week or so”, but to me, that seems like game playing.  She says it will make him miss me, well we just met, so I am not sure he’d miss me anyway.

I know I don’t like when someone plays these games with me, so I am not sure I’d want to do that.  Just looking for thoughts and opinions.

Our first time getting together was yesterday at a Panera Bread.  We met on an online dating site and I wanted to be in a public location.  We hit it off very well, and we talked and laughed for hours.  He has asked when can he see me again, and I don’t want to “make him wait” for a week or two…but would it seem as if I am too available if I don’t have him wait?

I am available on Tuesday and so that’s the day that I thought we could get together.  My friend says wait longer, since we just saw one another on Thursday.

I am new to the dating scene, I have been single for 2 years and I am just starting to get re-acquainted with all of these “rules.””


Thanks for your question.  While I’m sure your friend has your best interest at heart I don’t agree with her advice as it’s given.

While it’s widely understood that no one should be a doormat and available at someone’s beck and call it’s more about not canceling plans than pretending to have them.

The point about not being too available is that you should be living a full life not waiting on a guy to ask/take you out. Be sure to make plans with friends/spend some alone time/work on your hobby/passion. But don’t play any games you wouldn’t want played on you.

Since you’re available on Tuesday let him know that. Take your time, get to know him, and above all else enjoy yourself.


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